Best. Facebook. Birthday. Ever!
It’s official. I’m
starting a new trend. We’ll see if it
catches on. It has to do with celebrating
your birthday in a new way- especially on Facebook.
I have been a loyal Facebook user for a long time and have
grown to really enjoy and even anticipate the birthday love. In fact I penned a blog several years ago on this very topic. What I love about it is hearing from so many
people from different times and places in my life. I revel in that connection- even if it is only once a year.
This year, for a host of reasons, I was especially looking
forward to it. Maybe it’s the result of
moving full-time to Vermont, away from so many friends in MA. Maybe it has something to do with
transitioning into a different chapter in my career and missing my former
colleagues. Whatever the reason, I was
really looking forward to the day. But
an interesting thing happened. I began
to hear from lots of people beginning early in the morning. Most of them sent a simple Happy
Birthday. That’s probably the most
efficient way to make the gesture without too much of a commitment. But I found is curiously unsatisfying. It just felt a bit flat and empty so I
decided to do something about it. I
posted that at this stage in my life I am much more interested in experiences
and creating memories than anything else and so I wanted to spend the day
remembering some of those great memories and how my friends were part of
them. I began by posting one word or in
some cases one sentence about the person and our shared experiences.
I’m sure some people were a bit surprised to get my short
reply to their birthday post. Some
jumped right in and began sharing their memories of our time together. I quickly realized that this would be a fabulous way to spend the day. I actually took the time to think about each
and every person who I heard from. For some it was very easy to recall a
signature thing about them. Like my
friend Louis. Louis and I met in
business, he, at an advertising agency and I, at a media company probably
trying to sell him advertising. Here’s
what I remembered about Louis. Whenever
I would see him, he would open his arms and say, “Show me some sugar”. I just loved that about him and that is what came to mind as I remembered him.
Other people from very early in my life bubbled up- my dear friend Meredith. Meredith and I were
best friends when we were in elementary school and were in a secret club called
the Flying Eagles. That was her memory
and boy did it bring me a smile. I remember
our super secret meetings, and our custom designed t-shirts. I don’t remember exactly what we did in our
club of 7 year olds but we thought we were pretty special. Meredith moved to France a number of years
ago so my only connection with her now is through Facebook.
Another friend from high school remembered the many singing
adventures we went on together. We both sang in the high school choir and
travelled to All State chorus several times. She actually remembers us ending
up on neighboring cots in the nurse’s office when we returned from one of those
adventures. Wow. I wish my memory was that crisp.
A more recent memory that came bubbling back was
skinny-dipping with a friend after a soccer party at a very swanky Silicon Valley
home. Anyone who knows me well knows how
much I LOVE skinny-dipping and to have to sneak around to do it makes it even
more fun. That party was probably the highlight of the two years we lived on the West Coast.
A particularly special exchange for me was with my cousin
Rob. There was a famous recipe in our
family that our grandmother used to make every Christmas. The recipe was for peanut sticks, a delicious
hors d’oevre that was a real labor of love as it took hours to make them. That was the memory I shared with Rob and his
very quick reply was “Jincie”, my grandmother’s name. So we each were able to
spend a few minutes remembering our extraordinary grandmother.
There were lots of memories of shows that I have done over
the years. Facebook, as it turns out, is
a fabulous place to stay in touch with theatre friends and see and hear about
their latest and greatest artistic endeavors.
There were camp memories and parenting memories and work memories. One former colleague wrote that he missed me
every day. How good does that feel?
So why do I think my trend is bound to take off? Because it takes what has become routine for
many people and cranks it up a notch. It
moves it from being a day when you get a celebratory light touch from friends
through Facebook and turns it into a wonderfully rich day of connection and
memory. For isn’t that what’s it’s all
about? Isn’t it just awesome to get to
remember friends from every corner of your life- all on one day each year? Whether this takes off or not, I’m going to
stick with it. In fact, from now on when
I am moved to send a birthday greeting to any of my friends on Facebook, it’s
going to come with a fun shared experience for us to remember together. Who’s in?
